How Much is Too Much?
Our journey has been an interesting exercise in balance, as we find ourselves trying to gauge how much we can handle while retaining money, comfort, or sanity.
How many bags can we comfortably carry through an international airport?
When should we force a 5-year-old to walk by herself, instead of carrying her on our shoulders, when all the other school-aged children are walking by themselves and shoulder-carries seem uncouth?
How can I not react when my kids do something that they’re unaware is so totally culturally inappropriate in this country?
How far are we willing to travel with hungry, grumpy children who didn’t actually like anything we ordered?
In the absence of Uber XL and where taxis max out at 4 passengers, how much does a private car cost, and where do I get it?
How soon do we need to replace a backpack once it begins fraying, and where?
How quickly can we finish a snack before entering a transport option that does not allow eating?
Is it really worth running to the train if another is coming in 8 minutes?
What happens when bandwidth isn’t sufficient enough for everyone to stream on their own devices in their downtime? What do we do?
How many types of foods do I need to buy to balance my strong need to keep people fed while also not buying so much that we throw away a ton of food at the end of this?
Do I care more about offending Italians by ordering a latte in the afternoon, vs. offending myself by falling asleep after a lunchtime wine and pasta?
What is a reasonable amount to expect for a child to be responsible for as part of the family team preparing to leave the home? One kid responsible for remembering masks, another responsible for getting sunscreen, yet another for water bottles? What about each kid being responsible for their own things? What is a reasonable expectation based on ages ranging from 5 to 12?
How can I manage my feelings of frustration when I discover I wasn’t as prepared as I thought I was? When I’ve made a choice that led to the discomfort of the people around me?
How can I manage my feelings of disappointment when J and I failed to communicate and because of that, we have lost the opportunity to do something really special on our trip?
How can I suppress the perfectionism in me to just go with the flow when things don’t turn out right?
I daily balance these, and we are learning every time. We have suffered sunburns and scrapes and splinters. We have dealt with whining from kids annoying each other to hunger and boredom to discomfort, distaste, and being denied something they feel entitled to have.
It’s a balance. We change gears, and we develop new skills. We pivot and shift and step back to look at the big picture. This trip is changing us already and we are only in week 3.